It is! No matter how good or bad the change is or how beneficial the change may be it is hard.
The struggle to hold on to what was and the pain of the morphing process.
I have just realized tonight that I am in the morphing stage. It is painful and so far I feel I am handling some things poorly. I feel good with the idea of letting go to what was...I think. Time I guess will only tell but for all sense and purposes right now I feel good with that.
But the morphing feels out of control. Feels raw and exposed. And with that comes emotions. Anger, frustration, disappointment, loss, control, insecurity and fear. And that makes me want to give up and throw in the towel.
I want to finish well but all efforts seem thwarted, which cause the emotions to come back and make me want to give up all over again. This is very draining and perhaps, for more than just me.
I know that in time the morphing will finish and a new me will emerge. New experiences will await. The old is gone and the new is with each step. What happens is all unknown. However, with emerging comes choice...
I will either fall or learn to fly.
Will I have the courage and the freedom that comes with trying out new wings?
You're right. Change is difficult and emotional. What helped mebthi last year was Psalm 37:23 "the steps of a righteous man are ordered of the Lord...". I asked myself if I believed that. If God orders my steps, wha dis I have to worry about. Then, when my emotions careened in who knows what direction, I reminded myself of this and shot up a prayer of faith, an affirmation that He was in control. It provided peace. Change can be so exciting, and I'm excited for you guys. (oh dear, I can't edit all the sudden, so excuse the typos please). I pray moments of joy to infuse your days , that your emotions will lead you upward and onward. :)
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